Yesterday I met her again. I didn't know whether to talk to him or not, so we shied away. We walked alongside a time that became eternal and played dodge. But I did not kneel. I decided to go to his found before having one of the strangest conversations of my life. Simply, the words didn't come out ...
After his macha the sadness visited me once more, and it was not the first ... But the destination had reserved us a second chance on that fair and summer night.
A part of me needed to see her. I acknowledge that I looked for her and found her again. Then the youth of the seductive rebuff that I have inside, seized me. The words flowed back between the two under cover of the laughter of hearts at play.
In the end we ended up saying goodbye in one of the most beautiful ways I remember.
I know that in part I don't want to go back to her, but when my feelings take action everything is different. I can't help dreaming about playing and playing and seeing where the senses lead us. But what if I hurt myself? Is it worth it to expose me? What if she is the one who ends up suffering? I don't know if I could afford it ...
My consciousness sounds on the other side. He calls me to pay him a visit. He calls me to explain that there is no life without pain but that there are too many without passion. So I understand that taking risks is part of what makes us human. I understand that pain is not an escape signal, but a message. And the message is clear in this case. I don't know if we'll be together again. I don't know what I want after all the past. But I know I have a smile that I want to show. A hubbub in which I want to recreate. And that when I remember it, I realize that few things have taken me further to what they call happiness. So I decide to feel her here and now one more time. I decide to love that smile in the midst of the hangover of pain, and feel well prepared for a new storm of passion.
Dedicated to my friend David, because I know it costs, but he is one of the strongest and smartest people I know. And not only will it come out of this, but on the foundations of pain it will build new degrees of passion so as never to lose that happy smile that I saw coming with him the first time I saw him.
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