Beliefs are like a map of concepts that guide our lives without often realizing it. We are adopting them throughout life through education; either in academic institutions or through what we see and feel in our own lives. Being these of great importance for Improve Your Self Esteem.
As we all know, our subconscious has much more power than our conscious mind. This being the one that captures the information in a selective way. That is, she chooses what we process and how we process it through our mental structures. Hence, controlling our beliefs and learning to direct them is so important, since they are the ones responsible for articulating almost all of our subsequent behaviors.
- 1 You are responsible for programming your own beliefs
- 2 Do not identify with negative beliefs
- 3 Wake up beauty: Creativity in the art of love
- 4 We live in poetry: Poems and thoughts in prose
- 5 Start healing your past beliefs
You are responsible for programming your own beliefs
If, for example, a person has not done well in their studies, perhaps because of poor organization or lack of commitment; the attainment of a certain number of failures can lead him to repeat thoughts like this: «I am not good at studying, I better do something else».
This could lead her to abandon her studies when perhaps she was perfectly capable of obtaining excellent academic results. Being these thoughts that are repeated again and again as a kind of self hypnosis that leads us to believe what we say the more we repeat it. What leads us to create conditioning limit in control of our acts.
We go to the abyss or to the glory depending on where we put our attention. If that point leads us to perform with effort and enthusiasm in unknown areas, growth is assured. If that point makes us bet on the most comfortable and this behavior is repeated, sooner or later the mind rots. Opt for the unknown and brave will always be your way.
Beliefs condition us
When we face any situation automatically our mind starts up and begins to stimulate different emotional states. However, what we often lose sight of is that these emotions that drive us are continually influenced by our ways of thinking.
We operate by associations that lead us to deduce possible results on our actions. That is why when we feel unsuccessful in one area of our life, our vision towards other completely different areas automatically darkens. Being usual the arrival of inquisitors and Machiavellian judgments: «You are a disaster and as much as you try you have no remedy».
These judgments translate into momentary limiting beliefs that motivate our mood at that precise moment, and in deep-rooted beliefs if we continue repeating them over the course of the days. Being able to materialize them in the results of our own life by being ourselves the ones who are heading towards them because of the thought.
However, as much as our results may be bad, we are still the ones who have represented them through mental patterns. It is not something that defines us! They are only thoughts that guide us in a bad way. We can get rid of them!
Change your negative beliefs with positive representations
As Tony Ribbins teaches in his book Power without limits: «If we represent ourselves that things are not going to work out, they don't work out. If we form the representation that they will ask for word of mouth, then we create the internal resources that we need to produce the state that, in turn, enables us to obtain positive results ».
Remember a moment in your life when you felt completely confident, creative and secure in everything you did. Remember how in that state you had immediate answers to any doubt or impediment that arose, and imagine that you could recreate that state whenever you wanted. To which we will add a positive but realistic phrase that serves as a motivational lever. That is, a phrase that breaks the dynamics of negative thoughts so that they do not forge harmful beliefs.
Use beliefs through impulse phrases
It often happens to me that in times of downturn, I think: How is it possible that in past challenges similar to the current ones I would hardly doubt and now only find objections everywhere? A case before I thought so much about everything that could go wrong? Is it not that I am not in a proper state?
What I do then is to evoke in me those emotional states that in my past prompted me to recreate the same sensations and thoughts that I felt in those magical moments. I remember those beliefs that once motivated me to keep moving forward: «Any challenge is fraught with problems, but if I keep going, I will find the solutions. I just have to keep moving forward ».
The important thing is that you trust those positive beliefs that can restore you, and the best thing for that is to evoke them through memories. That is, using beliefs that are based on past experiences of their own. Like this one that is often used in action movies: "I've been worse than now and I've always come forward." The one that can bring to your mind the following message: «Yes, it is true that you have been worse. It is true that you have faced similar situations. It is true that in doing so you grew up and in the end they brought you positive things. Therefore now you will do the same ».
Beliefs that lead us from less to more
Another option is to create beliefs that empower us to go further by supporting them on simpler realities; as always happens in all progress. What, for example, can lead one to think: "If I have already set up a small successful company, what is the problem with now trying to set up a much larger project?"
This way of overcoming is related to the beliefs that if we already knew how to do something on a small scale we can elevate all that learning to a higher challenge. As is often the case with people who have experienced minor traumatic experiences, feeling much stronger in the face of facing major trauma in the future: "As bad as it happens tomorrow, the sun will rise again, so it has always been."
The best way to fight the darkness is to shed light on it. Get rid of the beliefs that limit you by empowering all those beliefs that make you grow and go one step further. Do not put the focus on what makes you feel inferior, put it on what makes you feel invincible.
Do not identify with negative beliefs
We saw it at the beginning of this article in the example of the person who said he was not worth studying. Forming our identity and our beliefs in this way can prove absurd. It is ridiculous to tell yourself that it is not worth something when you have barely made efforts to try.
This often occurs in societies where values on effort are vaguely scarce. In Spain and Latin America we continue to have that tendency to think that if something is not good for us, we will never be good at it. There is little spirit of overcoming.
The most curious thing is that I have often encountered a person who criticizes those who try to overcome or feel a feeling that: "You need to improve because you are not well." Which leads many to hide that spirit of overcoming by feeling ashamed. As if one had to walk with his head down, hiding that he likes to play sports, some duck their words hiding that they like to read about self-help topics.
The bad habits of the short term
In consumer societies, we have become accustomed to obtaining what we want or need quickly, with our patience constantly decreasing.
However, without patience a person perfectly capable of being very good at something, can end up quickly abandoning to small frustrations. You can create limiting beliefs like "Definitely ... I don't play basketball". And that says it when he has been playing a couple of afternoons with people who have been doing it for years ... Where is realism there?
Let's keep in mind that our mind often works too shortly. Something that motivates us arises, we fill ourselves with illusion imagining that we will be the most in that, and we throw ourselves into the load without thinking about it. But the things that are worthwhile are not simple and the coup does not usually take us to arrive when we do not tackle our illusions sincerely. That is, assuming the time and effort it can take us to develop to achieve them.
Analyze with awareness
The advice is simple, before structuring and formalizing thoughts in your mind, stop for a second and analyze them well. Well, it is possible that many of those beliefs that you impose are false and for the only thing they serve are to reduce your self-esteem, frustrate you or feel less capable and predisposed to fight for anything you want.
One way of doing this is empathy, for which we will go to the previous example. Do you really think that you are going to play basketball at a level similar to that of someone who has been doing it for years? Would that be fair? Why do you presuppose that you should have been born with a supernatural talent for it? Isn't that absurd?
Another way of being aware is common sense: Would it be reasonable for us to try to play an AC / DC theme in our first contact, and not being able to think that the guitar is not ours? I know it seems silly seen like that, but at the subconscious level I see many people with beliefs formed in this way. I see him every day! Do not do it. Realism is a fundamental factor for manage emotions in a healthy way
Assume only the challenges you can cover
If you are not willing to make the sacrifice that leads to being successful in something, then you have other interests, do not assume it. I am not willing to learn to play the guitar. Not because I don't like it, but because I prefer to learn more about other things like psychology or fashion, or keep improving my writing.
I have other interests is those that want to be good that already occupy my time. One must assume the challenges from a clear starting point, from the acceptance that one is willing to get involved and commit to that dream for a long time.
Don't judge me for my successes, judge me for the times I fell and got up again.
Start healing your past beliefs
Many people complain that it costs a lot get out of a negative dynamic As much as they try simply because they have not tried to heal that past that lodged in their subconscious, it continues to sabotage them again and again.
As we have previously noted, everything we have already experienced and everything we have thought and repeated over and over form part of our conditioning. What makes in our mind, as with a computer, there is a preset programming. However, this programming can be modified and updated to taste.
The way to do it is meditation and reflection; In addition to the use of other techniques such as that coming from NLP. To begin, reflect by leveraging your memories and look for those critical moments that led you to think in a negative way. You will be able to identify them quickly because our mind remembers very well everything that at the time struck us. From there, accept them as part of your life. Of a life you love deeply. Feel that love towards all your past moments. Without judging you negatively from them. Simply, with a poetic, positive and optimistic vision towards learning your own experiences for a better future.
An example of reprogramming a past experience
Imagine that we went through a traumatic couple break years ago. The person we loved left us for another, which made us feel miserable and unattractive. Taking this in turn to generate thoughts that today are beliefs that forge insecurities.
Now, from a relaxed space of no judgment and acceptance complete towards yourself, observe as if you were out of that image all that you thought and felt from common sense. Sinking you like what made that relationship fail at that time, may have led you to bring about changes in you so that in the future it doesn't happen. Or if you haven't made those changes, visualize yourself making them with enthusiasm in your next days.
From that argument that you have changed or are changed, remember those negative phrases that you told yourself at the time and with each breath, every time you release that air, imagine coming out of you. Releasing all those useless beliefs that do not lead you to enjoy life with confidence.
Little by little you will notice how you begin to feel better and your confidence in you grows at times. If you don't know very well how to do it because you have no experience meditating, you can start with my guided meditations in MP3. They are for free!
If we are to fail, we will fail. Where is the problem? We will learn from each of our failures. Attentive and expectant to savor intensely the successes that will come day by day. Faithful to our own way, there is nothing to fear. Just keep walking despite the stumbling blocks.