What happens when a boy / girl we love as he is, drives us crazy for his personality, but does not stay in the physical conditions that we would like? How do we ask you to exercise or follow a diet to lose weight?
Let's see how we can persuade and convince to our partner to fulfill that dream of taking care of ourselves and stop suffering that dreaded fear that some have for the sport.
1 # Visualize your goal
In a first step, if you have not already done so, you should visualize the reason for your persuasion objective. In this case: why do you want your partner to exercise and what benefits will that have for both of you.
During this phase you have to dream, visualizing how you exercise happily and lively and see yourself with your partner having fulfilled the objective and enjoying its benefits. This will make your mind dream and find arguments and ambitions to communicate and spread to your partner so develop the lip that you need to make her dream in this same line.
We dream of having a relationship in which both parties take care of each other, and in this way, maintaining an optimal physique, enjoy a more sexual and passionate relationship thanks to a greater physical attraction.
We can avoid problems related to insecurities and frustrations that can result in not being attractive. For example, one is always more likely to be jealous when one perceives that their physical state is not attractive, when our partner often interacts with other people who do take care of themselves more.
Therefore, here we visualize ourselves safer, more motivated and better able to achieve everything we want.
Health is increasingly important, and that makes us like to surround ourselves with people who want to take care of themselves and be healthy, in search of a better quality of life and the prevention of possible diseases.
We can imagine in a few years maintaining an iron health and an attractive physique.
2 # Put yourself in your shoes
All people perceive things in a different way. For your part you have already dreamed and have seen the benefits of the idea you want to convey. Now you have to see with which part of those dreams the person you want to persuade will be most identified, in this case your partner. Do the same exercise as in the previous section, but as if you were your partner.
We need to identify your needs. If, for example, your partner appreciates that you spend time together, more than having a greater physical attraction, your arguments should start along the line that generates the most interest.
People pay more attention to what interests us. That is why it is important that putting ourselves in the shoes of our partner, we detect what interests her most and start with those arguments, since they will be able to cause a greater initial impact, and use the rest of the arguments in a secondary way as a way of reinforcement. Often even the other person will be in charge of looking for those secondary arguments if you want that primary a lot.
If what our partner values most is social entertainment:
I have seen that there is a hiking club that makes several excursions every month around here. We could try, I searched online and it seems that people have a great time and it is very good for health. Besides, it wouldn't hurt to lose a few pounds.
3 # Avoid possible conflicts
We can detect a possible conflict of interest, to the extent that you want your partner to take more care (exercise and have a healthier diet), but he / she is not willing to make that sacrifice. Now let's see some options to avoid them.
Propose as a reference of conduct:
People tend to follow those other people in our circles who present themselves as leaders and promote beneficial actions.
In the previous example of section 2, it can be noted that we say “it wouldn't hurt me to lose a few kilos” instead of “it wouldn't hurt us”. When we have to tell someone something they need or have to do, offer us as a reference without involving the other person, it is a good way for them not to feel attacked but at the same time they feel interested in doing so as well.
Avoid asking your partner for something you don't do or are not willing to do with or at the same time he / she does. It's simple, if you want your partner to take care of himself and improve his physique, lead by example.
Use the informational influence:
How many times have you been interested in doing things that your friends did without them trying to persuade you to do them?
For example, in good life we are very interested in the topic of health. This makes that among us, we comment that we do in the gym, what sports we practice, and what food we carry.
In this way we are influencing our behavior through informational influence. That is, sharing information towards a focus of common interest. The greater this informational influence, the greater the motivation usually awakens certain actions such as sports or eating a healthy diet.
Use the normative influence:
Normative influence is the collective decision about what is the appropriate behavior. To use this type of influence we can rely on external arguments that come from information media, such as television, magazines, social networks or blogs.
For example: This afternoon I was on Facebook and I have seen an article about how beneficial it is to exercise and ultimately be fit in a relationship. He said that a relationship becomes more fiery and increases sexual desire, in addition to that it becomes more solid because many insecurities and frustrations are eliminated.
4 # Manage objections or excuses
We must be prepared to know how to manage the possible objections or excuses that our partner puts us and inject illusion into that activity focusing on the positive.
Imagine a hypothetical example in which uNo of the two decides that it is time to start taking care of yourself and take more care of your physique, and that you would also love for your partner to do the same. It may also be that one of the two is already taken care of and the other is not, but we will take this first case for this example.
We are going to introduce this conversational thread using the example of normative influence.
He: This afternoon I was on Facebook and I have seen an article about how beneficial it is to exercise and ultimately be fit in a relationship. He said that a relationship becomes more fiery and increases sexual desire, in addition to that it becomes more solid because many insecurities and frustrations are eliminated.
She: Man has his logic, but why do you say so, don't you like me like that? Do you think i'm fat?
Him: Hahaha, it's not that small! I really like how you are now, but I would like both of us to take care of ourselves a little. I think we could feel even more desire for each other, and at the same time spend more time together.
She: I don't know, you know that I don't exercise much about exercise.
He: It doesn't drive me crazy either, but I think it's all about getting started, I'm sure it's fun once it's part of the routine. In addition, I would love that we began to take care of ourselves and I know ... that even when we are 50 years old we continue to remain attractive and desirous, making love every day.
She: haha, man that's not bad! I see where you are going ...
He: In fact, the other day I was talking to a friend, and he told me that a guy who knew about the gym that he thought was 27 or 28 years old, told him he was 48 years old. It is amazing how exercising every day can keep people so young (Informational Influence).
She: pufff, now, but I don't know if I'm going to have time.
He: Man, at the beginning it will cost us, starting to exercise is hard because our muscles are not used to it, but in the long run we will surely like it and have a great time. And time is a matter of taking advantage of dead hours, and exercise makes us have more energy and yield more. It is a great investment.
Well, as we see in the example, the first thing that will jump from our partner are their defenses as insecurities. It is not an easy road, it will begin to put many obstacles, the fundamental one is:
- Be patient and don't despair. We will have to persist without being heavy and give plot twists that by repetition convince and motivate the other person. Make the other person see the benefits and dream of enjoying them, filling your mind with illusions of youth and sex, or whatever we see that you value most.
- Do not attack her / e. Avoid throwing things in your face like a left-handed person, or a bum and things like that. The goal is to motivate you to exercise to improve, not because it is needed and you have to be obliged.
- Keep up the good mood. Emotional states are spread. If we convey good humor and enthusiasm towards an idea, they will most likely follow us. Even if the other person becomes serious or angry at any given time, keep calm and try to take them to your land. You would be surprised how many times this works.
- If it hits you or attacks you, simply appeal that you are being honest and honest with him / her and that your intention is to improve your relationship to make it more solid and passionate.
Resigning is not the solution to problems. It can be a good strategy for small things without importance. But for what really matters, for what we feel is valuable and vital in our lives, resignation is a time bomb. Better to fight! Although defeat stalks us and succumbs to the trembling of our bones.
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